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Patricia Holbrook

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What Will They Say… When You Leave? {Atlanta Journal Constitution}

June 12, 2017 by Patricia

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He didn’t see me coming from behind. Intently staring at his cell phone, I could see by his broad smile that whatever was on the screen was either funny or brought him much joy. As I kissed his cheek, he woke from the trance and hugged me.

“Let me show you something,” my stepdad said.

He pulled the message from his cell phone, and read his daughter-in-law’s text out loud.

She spoke of his influence in her life, and the admiration she holds. He grinned from ear to ear, the words filling his heart with joy.

“I never thought she felt this way about me,” he said.

What followed was a conversation about people that we influence and don’t even know it.

A similar situation happened to me just the day before. As I was leaving my church’s choir room, a lady that I know from a distance stopped to thank me for something I had written the week before. Her eyes filled with tears as she told me that the devotional had been received “right when she needed it.”

As my stepdad and I continued discussing the importance of leaving a positive legacy, a Christian song that I heard years ago kept coming to mind.

The song, titled “What’s Your Story,” speaks of small gestures that seem to go unnoticed, but which impact people’s lives daily. In the chorus of the song, a poignant question rings, which I will never forget:

“What will they say when you leave?”

Wow. Think about it.

In the song, the idea behind the question is to make us think about how we are impacting eternity, but, in reality, the honest answer to this question can help influence each word we say and every decision we make.

If we were a fly on the wall … what would we hear people say when we leave the room? Click To Tweet

The fact of the matter is — we impact people’s lives daily. From the shyest of human beings to the most famous and outspoken world leader — whether on a small or large scale — our words, actions and decisions leave a mark. No question about it.

We simply don’t stop to reflect on this truth often enough. Should we do it, we would hold our tongues more often. We would think longer before commenting on social media. We would pray more before acting. And wait a little longer before hastily jumping to conclusions.

We would be more sympathetic, and more forgiving. More caring, and more careful.

Some of Jesus’ most famous words recorded in the gospels are compiled in a sermon famously named “The Beatitudes.” At the end, he summarizes his teaching with what is known as The Golden Rule: “Treat others the same way you want to be treated.”

As I think about the people in my life — from husband to children, from parents to siblings, from acquaintances to my closest friends, I want to live a life that, though far from perfect, will essentially leave a positive mark when I leave. I don’t need to know about it, but I want to live a life which will be remembered as one that brought more joy than sorrow, more laughter than tears, more forgiveness than revenge.

It’s not a matter of “if” they will say something when you leave. It’s a matter of “what” they will say.

May God help us remember that, the next time we feel the urge to say something negative, complain, or seek to retaliate. Someone is always watching. Your words can be forgiven, but not forgotten. Neither will your love and kindness.

May they say great things about us, every time we leave the room. May our loving influence remain, long after we leave this world.

This article was published on Patricia’s column for The Atlanta Journal Constitution on Saturday, June 10, 2017.

When you leave this earth, will you leave a lasting, positive influence? Read this. Click To Tweet
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Filed Under: AJC, Blog Tagged With: AJC, Atlanta Journal Constitution, Faith & Values, leaving a legacy, Matthew 5, Patricia Holbrook AJC, Patricia Holbrook's Column, positive influence, sumpathetic, The Beatitutes, The Golden Rule

About Patricia

Patricia Holbrook is the President of Soaring with Him Ministries, author, columnist, blogger, wife and mom. Her passion is to encourage her audience to "soar above life's circumstances" by the power of God's Word and the Holy Spirit's guidance. She writes about making beauty out of brokenness, trusting God in the dark, the blessings of obedience and her love for the Savior. Among other places, you can find her writing weekly on her blog, www.soaringwithHim.com. on her weekend column for the Atlanta Journal Constitution www.ajc.com, on iDisciple and websites such as LifeLetter Cafe, among others. Patricia is also a national and international speaker for women's events and is currently attending Covington Seminary, where she is enrolled in their Master’s program in Bible Studies.

Comments

  1. Martha Orlando says

    June 12, 2017 at 12:16 pm

    Amen, Patricia! Even in small ways, what we say and do will leave a mark for better or worse on the people surrounding us. May we always pray and think before we act!
    Blessings!

    • Patricia says

      June 13, 2017 at 1:30 pm

      Yes and yes, Martha! God bless you!

  2. Laura Starner says

    June 13, 2017 at 9:36 am

    So true! I think about this often. May we be a light in the darkness and a kind word for someone who needs it. #kindnessmatters

    • Patricia says

      June 13, 2017 at 1:31 pm

      It sure does, Laura. It’s true to say that we are the only Bible many will ever “read.” What a sobering thought! Thanks for visiting!

  3. Sherry Stahl says

    June 13, 2017 at 9:53 am

    Patricia,
    This is the second time I’ve linked up beside you. Your site is so lovely and your words soothing. Such a great encouragement today. Praying your influence is increased as you seek to influence others for HIM!
    Be Blessed & Refreshed,
    ~Sherry Stahl
    xoxo

    • Patricia says

      June 13, 2017 at 1:32 pm

      Oh, how sweet, Sherry! I will be visiting yours as well. I appreciate the kindness and encouragement. God bless you!

  4. Diana says

    June 13, 2017 at 3:19 pm

    I absolutely loved this post . Holding my tongue is something I have been actively working on because I tend to say hastily whatever is on my mind. I want to leave a positive influence when I am no more (in the room or on this earth)

    Diana

    • Patricia says

      June 21, 2017 at 12:09 pm

      Amen, Diana! One of the things I pray is that the Fruit of the Spirit will be evident in my life. I quote it a lot… I need it!

  5. Kaitlin Garrison says

    June 13, 2017 at 6:46 pm

    Wow! This is so true! It’s so important to think about what kind of legacy we are leaving behind. My grandpa- in- law just passed away in December and WOW. He really showed me what it meant to leave a legacy behind, because he empowered people of all ages and generations. It’s such an important question to ask ourselves– thank you for sharing!!

    • Patricia says

      June 21, 2017 at 12:13 pm

      Isn’t it wonderful to be able to look at someone’s life when they die and see an amazing legacy of faithfulness? That’s how I pray I will be remembered by my grandchildren. So great! Thanks for stopping by Kaitlin and sharing your story. God bless you!

  6. Rodney Olsen says

    June 13, 2017 at 7:28 pm

    While many people want to be influencers they can fail to see that most of the influence we have is through the everyday things we do. It’s often not in the actions we take but in the overflow of who we really are. When who we really are is a reflection of Christ our influence will make a positive difference in the lives of others.

    • Patricia says

      June 21, 2017 at 12:15 pm

      Amen, Rodney! May God help us to be more like Christ each day – that’s the true impact of the Gospel: When we become walking bibles, not just talking ones 🙂 Blessings to you!

  7. John Miller says

    June 14, 2017 at 9:03 am

    Great thoughts on perspective! Small acts over time can make bigger impacts than we realize.

    • Patricia says

      June 21, 2017 at 12:17 pm

      Thanks, John! So glad you stopped by! Blessings to you,

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