“All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.” Matthew 5:37
Are you afraid of saying no? I am!
What a gift that Scripture doesn’t condemn the word no. Rather, the Bible highlights the importance of keeping your word, whether it’s a yes or a no.
Every no is a yes to something else, and vice versa.
Imagine if Jesus was as uncomfortable with saying no as so many of us are.
What if, instead of saying “get behind me, Satan!” to Peter, He said “you’re right, Peter. I’ll stop all this talk of being killed because it’s too dark and too uncomfortable.” What if instead of taking a rest from time to time Jesus wore his human body down with non-stop healings, miracles, and other ministries, preventing himself from going from town to town?
It wasn’t by saying yes to every opportunity, to every person in power, or to spare other’s feelings that Christ saved the world.
It wasn’t by saying yes to every opportunity, to every person in power, or to spare other’s feelings that Christ saved the world. @BethanyMcIlrath Click To Tweet
In order for Jesus to do much of what He came to do, He had to say no. He had to say it firmly, assuredly, and without going back on His word. When Pharisees and others told Him what not to do, Jesus said no. When His own brothers urged Him to attend a festival and reveal Himself, He said “no,” citing God’s timing.
Perhaps most important about Jesus’ yes was that His response was to God first.
Every no Jesus spoke was to preserve the yes He gave to the Lord.
I suspect many of us say yes before we ask the Lord or consider what He has asked of us. We justify it, trying to explain away our yes as selflessness, responsibility, or making the most out of every opportunity. Maybe we even justify our yes in the name of the Lord, and fear saying no to others as if every no is a selfish offense to God.
But His Word challenges the notion:
“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” Galatians 1:10
If you also go through your day feeling like yes is always the best answer, think about who you are saying yes to. Is it the Lord?
Does your “no” protect your “yes, Lord?”
{A version of this was previously published here}
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Thank you, Bethany, for this encouragement to steward my yes AND my no with care–and with God’s help and guidance.
Thank you, Michele, for being here
In my early Christian life, I thought I had to say yes to every opportunity of service asked of me. One quickly gets overwhelmed that way! Thanks you for showing us through Jesus that no is just as holy as yes within God’s will.
Me too! Amen, thank you Jesus that our yes is set apart for him!
Bethany, this is SO TRUE!!! I had to find this out the hard way! Still, I have to remind myself from time to time that I can’t do everything and I shouldn’t try to do everything. Thanks for these reminders!
I had to find this out the hard way too, and I still have to sometimes! Grateful for grace!
What a powerful post, Bethany! If we only consider how our no is a yes to something else and vice versa. And to ask God first. Jesus is the perfect example of knowing when a firm no is called for. I want to go through my day with my “no” protecting my “yes, Lord?”
Karen you summarize so well what I said so much less elegantly, thank you!! May our days be full of no protecting our yes to Him!
SO GOOD. Every no is a yes to something else, and as I learn to be unapologetic in my “no” I find I have so much more time for what really matters. Needed this reminder today – grateful!
Amen, isn’t it amazing how much more time we have for what matters when we say no to what doesn’t?! Thanks for joining in!
Bethany, my husband was better at saying “no” to those in positions of authority in our early years of marriage. If our pastor asked us to teach a class I wanted to say yes. But he’d consider the cost and felt free to say “not now.” His example helped me. The world didn’t fall apart because we said no.
Praise God for your husband. Mine is good at a gracious, wise “no” too and I’m so thankful for that!
Great wisdom here.
Thanks, Lauren!
There are such important times and places for both our yes’s and our no’s. Thanks for the encouragement to not back away from either.
Thank you, Lisa!