God blessed me with a godly and kind mother-in-law. When her independence began to wane, Larry and I invited her to live with us. Having lived thousands of miles apart, we sincerely welcomed the opportunity to have her in our home. However, she wouldn’t consider leaving Arizona.
Larry sent monthly checks to help her fill the gap in her living expenses, but we didn’t know what we’d do when she required full-time care. Our income wouldn’t stretch to cover that expense.
Larry and I felt a level of responsibility to ensure Grandma was well taken care of in her latter years. Perhaps because our visits were spread out, we recognized her decline better than she did. When she refused our offer, we didn’t know how to fulfill our duty and desire to help her. God used this incident to help us learn the difference between being faithful and being responsible.
Being Faithful Versus Being Responsible
Being “reliable or dependable” is good and godly (Psalm 15:4). For our purpose, let’s call that faithfulness.
- Faithfulness is doing our best in the power of the Holy Spirit and leaving the results to God.
- An inflated sense of responsibility is carrying the burden for outcomes beyond our resources or control.
Losing my mother as a teenager, accompanied by my father’s paralyzing grief, amped my firstborn sense of responsibility. I equated being responsible with being dependable. But when being responsible means depending on myself and my resources instead of relying on God, it’s unhealthy and ungodly.
This kind of responsibility steals our peace and joy. It depends on our efforts instead of on God’s faithfulness. This sense of duty doesn’t allow mistakes or rest. It leaves no time to notice God’s everyday provisions, let alone savor them. The responsible person jumps from one challenge to the next, always on duty, not trusting others to share the load.
The faithful work hard, but they also know when to recharge, when to put human needs before the goal, and when to celebrate small wins. They know God is big enough to take care of them and their future.
The faithful work hard, but they also know when to recharge, when to put human needs before the goal, and when to celebrate small wins. They know God is big enough to take care of them and their future. @debbiewwilson Click To TweetBeing faithful and being responsible may look similar, but the difference is vast and eternal. For example, consider how these different viewpoints affect even our interpretation of scripture.
“Go to the ant, O sluggard,
Observe her ways and be wise,
Which, having no chief,
Officer or ruler,
Prepares her food in the summer
And gathers her provision in the harvest” (Proverbs 6:6-8, NASB).
The Responsible Responds: “It’s up to me to…”
- Predict possible troubles.
- Prepare for the unknown.
- Take care of myself and loved ones.
The Faithful Responds: “He is able to…”
- Direct my steps (Psalm 37:23).
- Supply my needs (Psalm 34:4-10; Philippians 4:19).
- Secure my future (Matthew 6:33-34, 1 Peter 5:7).
Faith Produces Faithfulness
The Bible says the righteous live by faith. Faith produces faithfulness. God calls us to be faithful stewards whose security rests in our faithful Provider, not in our storehouses.
The Bible says the righteous live by faith. Faith produces faithfulness. God calls us to be faithful stewards whose security rests in our faithful Provider, not in our storehouses. @debbiewwilson Click To TweetWhat’s the difference between being responsible and being faithful?
- The responsible person works for tomorrow but misses today’s joy.
- The faithful person prepares for tomorrow while enjoying today.
Remember Larry’s mom? When dementia set in, God provided a wonderful place in her beloved Arizona that didn’t require a penny more than the sale of her house.
With rising inflation and rumors of greater shortages, it’s tempting to worry about tomorrow and miss the joys of today. Consider your concerns. Will you look to your efforts or God’s faithfulness to carry you through?
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Which Is Better, Being Responsible or Being Faithful? Join my friend @debbieWwilson as we compare the two. Share your blog! #RechargeWednesday, #Faithful Click To Tweet
Debbie, this is a powerful message with good insight. I’m glad it worked out for your MIL.
Your descriptions and comparisons of responsibility versus faithfulness are eye-opening. And this: “The responsible person works for tomorrow but misses today’s joy.”
Thanks, Karen. Remembering God’s faithfulness provides support in uncertain times.
Having looked after both my mother and MIL near the end of their lives, your post spoke to my heart today, Debbie. Thank you for clarifying the differences between being faithful and being responsible.
Blessings!
Martha, I’ve sure you learned a lot through those experiences.
Thanks for sharing this great message, Debbie. When we trust God, He shows us His faithfulness. And faithfulness is what He asks of us. Faithfulness is the way to joy. God bless!
Yes, Nancy. I just need to let Him be God!
What a great way to explain the difference between being responsible and being faithful! I choose to be faithful! It is a relief to know that God will carry our burdens. When our faith is in Him, our loads are light!
Blessings, Jo
Amen, Jo!
This is so meaningful 2 my own family 2day. Your analogy with your mother-in-law is a wonderful example of what it means to leave all our cares at Jesus’ feet being anxious 4 nothing…
Jan, God keep reminding me I can trust Him!
What a powerful testimony to God’s faithfulness! And this is so convicting. I often struggle with an over-developed sense of responsibility, and this clarifies the difference between that and faithfulness. Thank you!
Bethany, it’s an easy trap to fall into. Have a good weekend.
Thank you, Debbie. This is a much-needed understanding with so many of us caring (or who will be in the future) for our parents and in-laws. We had to wrestle with these same truths. So I appreciate your wise words.
Thank you, Donna.