We compare our food choices in order to make an informed decision about what we eat. Our employers compare our work to industry standards to help us succeed. God in His Word compares the things of the flesh with the things of the Spirit to teach us.

Comparisons brew trouble, though, when we make them in order to evaluate something already decided.

It’s no good to compare ourselves to others to determine our worth- God’s already decided that.
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There is also no gain in comparing our situations with others’ to evaluate if we have enough- God’s already provided.

Despite the apparent foolishness of unhealthy comparisons, the temptation looms anyway. If we have no helpful comparison to make, we’ll often settle for whatever reference point we can get.

Fortunately, there are many better comparisons that God suggests we make:

#1: Compare Hard Circumstances With Future Glory

“For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison” –2 Cor 4:17

Holding up our troubles against what we know of future glory is a helpful comparison. There are so many things we don’t and won’t understand in our earthly lives. But we do have the promise that everything weighing us down now will be outweighed (beyond measure!) in the wonderful, perfect, glory of eternity.

EXAMPLE:

Joni Eareckson Tada, who has lived 50 years paralyzed from the neck down, often compares her present hardship to the whole and complete resurrection body God will give her in the future. The hurt of now doesn’t hold a candle to the joy of that day.

#2: Compare Yourself to God Instead of Others

“To whom then will you liken God, or what likeness compare with him?” –Isaiah 40:18

Looking around at others gives us a false standard of measurement. We easily fall into the snares of putting people up on pedestals or building ourselves up at others’ expense. Jealousy, slander, greed, and sinful excuses often result.

When we compare ourselves to God instead of to others, we are given an accurate and beneficial perspective- on ourselves, others, and God.

EXAMPLE:

Job’s story reverberates with unfairness. After tremendous loss, his friends (who, though unwise, still had their lives put together) came by to compare Job to wicked men and their own ideas.

God stepped in and had Job compare himself to God, asking where he was when the earth was formed or if he could shut up the sea. Through the comparisons, Job was both humbled and comforted as he better recognized God as God and himself as a mere but beloved man.

#3: Compare Your Response to God’s Commands

“Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.” –2 Cor 13:5

In our performance-driven culture, we often compare what we do with worldly measures. We subconsciously form definitions of success, righteousness, and wisdom based on our experiences instead of God’s Word.

Comparing our responses, actions, and attitudes to God’s Word helps us see our need for God’s mercy. When we make this kind of comparison, we learn to abide in Him. Instead of striving vainly, we find ourselves seeking God, believing following His will is success, righteousness, and wisdom.

EXAMPLE:

A certain guy I know points out that when we find ourselves defensive, we need to check whose will we are justifying. Often our response to criticism reveals sinful motives. That’s an opportunity to apologize humbly, listen carefully, and demonstrate that God is the One we live to please and His word is worth obeying.

Swapping out better comparisons for the unhealthy kind we often make secures us in our God-given identity.

[This post was originally published here]

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LINKUP is open. This week, my friend @BethanyMcIlrath suggests 3 kinds of comparisons to make instead of the unhealthy, envious kind we tend to choose. Join us? #RechargeWednesday
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After persistent pleading, I finally agreed to play Mario Kart with my daughters. Our teenager had asked us to purchase the video game at the end of the school year, so they could enjoy it during their summer vacation. I was reluctant, since my plan was to spend the summer enjoying fun outdoor activities, while cutting screen time to a minimum.

Thanks to endless rainy days, my summer plans didn’t stand. Needless to say, there are only so many activities that a mother can come up with indoors.

That’s how I found myself with a Wii remote control in my hand, trying to figure out how to play my girls’ new favorite game.

The game is pretty simple. You hold a certain button on the remote control, which helps you accelerate, while turning the control to avoid walls, other cars, and – every so often – dark abysses.

The screen is split in two, so that you can watch your opponent’s race as well.

In the first several attempts, I did not have to do much to find myself hammered against walls, falling in abysses, and ending in last place. Mom was certainly having a hard time adapting to the oh-so-sensitive remote control.

But after playing the game for a while, my hands became steadier and my stats started improving.

As I realized that my little car had finished in fourth, then third place, my competitive spirit kicked in and I decided to get ahead of my opponents.

That’s when I started playing with one eye on my screen and the other on my daughter’s race.

I wanted to know her placement.

I had to see what extra powers she had acquired.

I tried to copy her moves.

And every time my eyes got off my lane, my race, I watched my little car plunge into an abyss, or hit a wall.

So long as I kept my eyes on my game, my car ended pretty well. Not first place — but not bad for this Atari generation mom. But the moment I decided to pay attention to the other cars in the race, I would lose my place and fall behind.

The popular video game made me think of something that I believe has become increasingly challenging in our society.

In this era of social media and reality TV shows, where we find ourselves comparing our not-so-glamorous lifestyles, inexpensive summer plans or struggling relationships to the Joneses on the screen, I believe many of us are crashing and burning, simply because we don’t focus on our own race.

Many of us are crashing and burning, simply because we don’t focus on our own race.
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Whether comparing our bodies, children, marriages, jobs, friendships or ministries, we are living at a time of social distraction, where the grass seems always greener on the other side, and we often fall in the trap of pushing our way into someone else’s lane.

As I browse through my journal for the past year or so, it is evident that God has been working on this very issue in my life: “Stay focused on your race. Do not compare. Do not copy others. Just listen to My prompting and follow Me.”

Just as my thumbprints are unique, so are God’s plan for my life. My neighbor’s race was never meant to be a standard by which I measure my own success. Her fingerprints are hers. So is her race. God’s timing for each story is unique to that person’s readiness to fulfill their destiny. We must not forget that.

God’s timing for each story is unique to that person’s readiness to fulfill their #destiny.
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May God help us stop wasting precious time and energy comparing ourselves to or mimicking others. Rather, let us concentrate on doing our very best on the lane God gave us to run. For then, even if we do not finish first, even if our journey is not as rich and full of applause as someone else’s, all that matters is that we finish our exclusive, individual course, and finish it well. That’s true success, not necessarily as the world views it. It’s success – God’s way.

This article was originally published in Patricia’s Column for The Atlanta Journal Constitution (AJC) on Saturday July 8th, 2017.

Struggling to stay focused on your own race? Constantly comparing yourself to others? Read this!
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The king continued walking through his garden, dismayed by its desolate state, when he came across a small violet. Its tiny frame was beautifully bright and full of life. The king told the small flower: “You look radiant! You don’t seem to be the least disheartened about the misery and discouragement around you.” The violet replied: “No, I am not. I know I’m small, yet, I imagine that if you wanted an oak tree or a pine tree where I am, you would have planted one. Since I know you wanted a violet, I am determined to be the very best violet I can be.”

This allegory gives me pause. It makes me think of how much time and energy we waste wishing for something we cannot attain, or striving to be someone we were never meant to be. We hear stories of beautiful women who submit themselves to excruciatingly painful procedures to change their body’s shape. We watch as people’s faces become deformed because they cannot accept aging as a natural process of life. We hear about young teenagers who starve themselves in an attempt to look like celebrities and models on magazines. We witness preachers striving to copy famous preachers, parents pushing their kids to the extremes of competition, and employees begrudging their peers for being promoted. Envy and jealousy sear in a society that insists on believing that the grass is always greener on the other side.

I can’t help but imagine God as the king in the story, sadly walking through his garden and watching his plants become gloomy and lifeless where he planted them. He watches as we sneer at his provision and his unique design for each of our lives, and as his work becomes repetitious and dull, rather than vibrantly unique.

It’s not that we shouldn’t strive to become better. I am certainly not against all plastic surgery, seeking better job opportunities or admiring those who are great examples of leadership for the work of the kingdom. We should indeed look at successful people and appreciate their unique virtues and, whenever their success is more than skin deep, even look up to them as great examples to follow. But the issue becomes when we are so engrossed comparing ourselves to others and desiring their shade of glory, that we forget that God has a unique plan for each one of us, and that our job is to be the very best we can be, wherever he plants us.

It’s true — the happiest, most successful and fulfilled human beings are those who embrace their uniqueness, play on their strengths and find contentment wherever God places them. Whether as a mighty oak tree or a small violet planted on the corner of the garden, their secret is accepting themselves and their place of service with grateful hearts, remembering that if and when God wants them to bear fruit elsewhere, he will make provision to move them to a broader field.

Patricia Holbrook is a Christian author and national conference speaker. Her book, “Twelve Inches: Bridging the
Gap Between What You Know About God and How You Feel,” is available on Kindle, at Barnes and Nobles, Amazon and other retailers. Visit her website at www.soaringwithhim.com Email: pholbrook@soaringwithHim.com

The post Comparison – Joy and Purpose Killer {Atlanta Journal Constitution} appeared first on Soaring With Him Ministries.