How do two porcupines hug? Very Carefully. How do we love our enemies? With divine grace and guidance.

Jesus told His disciples to love their enemies. What did He mean? What does it look like to love your adversary?

We associate love with warm feelings. I love beach sunsets, chocolate chip cookies, and my standard poodles. What do I mean when I toss love around these dissimilar objects? I love how sunsets look, cookies taste, and my dogs make me feel.

Biblical love is not based on how someone makes me feel. Negative behavior on their part can’t squash biblical love because it flows from God.

Why Should I Love My Enemy?

While refraining from vengeance is wise, it’s not enough. We “overcome evil with good,” not neutrality (Romans 12:19-21). Doing good crushes evil, heals our souls, and radiates Jesus.

Hate is the typical human response to wrong. That’s why showing forgiveness, like the members of Emanuel AME Church in Charleston, SC displayed, stuns the world. After tragically losing nine members in a hate shooting, these church members forgave the killer. Their actions freed themselves from the torment of bitterness and beamed God to the world better than any sermon.

Who Benefits When I Love My Enemy?

Notice who benefits from love (italics added).

• “The merciful man does himself good, but the cruel man does himself harm” (Proverbs 11:17 NASB).
• “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your rewardwill be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked” (Luke 6:35 NIV).
• “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’” (Matthew 25:40 NLT).

Loving our enemies blesses Jesus, transforms us, and reveals God’s grace to a hurting world. God rewards those who do good to their enemies. Love shows we belong to the heavenly Father (Matthew 5:44-45).

What Does Love for My Enemy Look Like?

When God tells us to love our enemies, He isn’t asking us to manufacture warm feelings. Godly love seeks a person’s eternal best and is displayed through action. Christ demonstrated ultimate love on the cross by dying for us while we were still enemies (Romans 5:10).

Love seeks what’s best for all involved. Praying for the offender is one way to do this. Stopping to help when they experience trouble is another.

God told the Israelites to return their brother’s stray ox or donkey when they found it (Deuteronomy 22:1). If they found their enemy’s lost animal, they were to return it, too (Exodus 23:4). In other words, they were to always do what’s right.

If you return your brother’s lost property, you might stay and share a meal together. However, when you return your enemy’s animal, you probably won’t stick around to socialize.

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Can I Set Limits with My Enemy?

C. S. Lewis said, “Love is something more stern and splendid than mere kindness.” Love sets protective boundaries. It says, “Your raging is not good for either of us. I’m going to my bedroom. When you’ve calmed down, I’ll hear your thoughts.” The Holy Spirit produces love and self-control.

David refused to retaliate or curse Saul when the opportunity arose. Yet, he stayed in hiding and refused to return to the castle when King Saul confessed his wrongs against David. Saul’s actions showed he really hadn’t changed.

Jesus demonstrated the firm and soft sides of love. He blasted the Pharisees for their hypocrisy and refused to speak to Herod who’d beheaded His cousin John the Baptist (Luke 23:9). Yet, He wept over Jerusalem and went to the cross for all these men (Matthew 23:37).

Where Do I Find the Power to Love My Enemy?

God is love. His Holy Spirit equips us to love even the prickliest of people. With Christ ruling our hearts we no longer love based on how others act. We love based on who we are in Christ. Nobody can rock that.

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