New Year resolutions Archives - Soaring With Him Ministries

Column & Interview with Lysa Terkeurst – Good Boundaries and Goodbyes

Patricia — Mon, 02 Jan 2023 10:30:00 +0000

According to a survey performed by the website Statista.com between Oct. 25 and Nov. 2, 2022, the top 5 New Year’s resolutions for 2023 have not changed from the year before: Exercising more is No. 1, followed by eating healthier, losing weight, saving more money and spending more time with family and friends.

Certain elements are undoubtedly crucial to accomplish goals: Perseverance, self-control, and determination are at the top of the list. Likewise, challenging our self-imposed limitations is essential to reaching any objective.

But another essential characteristic is at the heart of every success: establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries.

Think about it — a perfectly good practice can become harmful without boundaries. Likewise, relationships that were once joyful can turn unbearably toxic without them.

If we were to perform a survey, I am confident we would be surprised at how many people reach the end of a year with a negative emotional balance regarding certain relationships. It could be a struggling marriage, an estranged child, or a friendship that saps our energy instead of filling our hearts with joy.

If we were to perform a survey, I am confident we would be surprised at how many people reach the end of a year with a negative emotional balance regarding certain relationships. @ajc @LysaTerKeurst @Proverbs31org…
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Regardless, instead of pushing through into another year feeling hopeless and defeated, it would do us good to inventory the health of our relationships. As we do, we may conclude that certain people continually hurt us because we have yet to establish healthy boundaries.

Interviewing Lysa Terkeurst

I recently interviewed New York bestselling author and president of Proverbs 31 ministries Lysa Terkeurst about her newly released book, “Good Boundaries and Goodbyes.”

Listen to Patricia's interview with @LysaTerKeurst about #Goodboundariesandgoodbyes #LysaTerkeurst #Proverbs31ministries @Proverbs31org @ajc
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Terkeurst is one of the leading female Christian voices today, with more than 25 books published and a thriving ministry. I have followed her journey for many years and have been inspired by her practical, down-to-earth approach to daily issues that women of faith face.

Terkeurst writes from a place of deep commitment to biblical doctrine, beautifully shining God’s truth into women’s struggles and important faith subjects, often baring her soul to her audience while sharing her journey through dark valleys. Her latest book is no different.

Good Boundaries and Goodbyes

In “Good Boundaries and Goodbyes,” Terkeurst shares spiritual wisdom and practical insights from her life, including tools she developed with God’s help and through counseling while navigating the rough waters of a troubled marriage that ended in divorce.

Her book shines a light on how to establish healthy boundaries in troubled, dysfunctional relationships and, whenever all attempts to save it fail, how to say goodbye confidently.

@LysaTerkeurst new book Good Boundaries and Goodbyes shines a light on how to establish healthy boundaries in troubled, dysfunctional relationships and, whenever all attempts to save it fail, how to say goodbye confidently.…
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During our conversation, we discussed how common it is for Christians to have difficulty establishing boundaries and saying goodbye when a relationship becomes unbearably toxic, and the other person refuses to change their behavior.

It’s certainly not unusual for well-intended believers to find themselves in emotionally abusive relationships because they are afraid that establishing boundaries can be perceived as unkind or the opposite of Christlike behavior. Terkeurst explains that not only is that belief incorrect, but it is also not biblical:

“(…) I discovered that boundaries are not just a good idea; they are God’s idea,” she said. “Right from Genesis 1, God formed the earth with boundaries. And then, in the first recorded conversation between God and men (Adam) in Genesis 2, God chose the subject of boundaries (…). I find that fascinating.”

'Boundaries are not just a good idea; they are God’s idea.' ~ LysaTerkeurst #Goodboundariesandgoodbyes #LysaTerkeurst @Proverbs31ministries @Proverbs31org
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Setting Boundaries

Just as it was for Adam and Eve, setting limits is not meant to bind or hurt our relationships. On the contrary, it is intended to set us free and protect us.

Ultimately, setting boundaries is an expression of love. Because allowing our loved ones to push our limits continually is not an expression of love. It’s called enabling bad behavior.

When we set boundaries from a place of love instead of bitterness, we invite our relationships to grow deeper, become more honest, and love people without losing ourselves.

That is certainly a New Year’s goal worth pursuing.

Find out more about Lysa Terkeurst’s ministry and new book: lysaterkeurst.com/. Listen to Patricia’s interview with Lysa on the podcast God-Sized Stories with Patricia Holbrook.

This article was originally published in Patricia’s column for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on Saturday, December 31, 2022. Click HERE to find it on the AJC’s website.

!!! Lysa is giving away a copy of GOOD BOUNDARIES AND GOODBYES to one of Patricia’s followers!!!
Just share this post or podcast on social media and tag Patricia for a chance to win. The winner will be announced on social media on January 10th.

Listen to the podcast episode below. If you are reading this in your email, please CLICK HERE to listen to the podcast. This interview is also available on YouTube. CLICK HERE to watch it.

Use the links below to share on Social media!

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Faith: A New Year’s Goal Worth Pursuing

Debbie W. Wilson — Wed, 28 Dec 2022 09:34:00 +0000

“But the righteous will live by his faith” (Habakkuk 2:4 NASB).

Soft may be desirable in pillows and toilet paper, but not in body tone or faith. As I evaluated where I want to go in the new year, I realized my faith needs toning.

Both my body and soul require good nutrition and exercise. My Bible feeds my faith, but I must read it and apply it to be strong. Knowing the perils of fragile faith and the benefits of firm faith motivates me to build my faith muscles.

Let’s take inventory of the condition of our faith so we’ll know where to begin.

Fragile Faith:

Frets because it forgets our heavenly Father knows our needs. (Matthew 6:30, Psalms 23:1)
Is timid and fearful (Matthew 8:26)
Is easily sabotaged by distractions (Matthew 14:30-31)
Quickly forgets God’s history of faithfulness (Matthew 16:8-10)
Lacks spiritual power (Matthew 17:18-21)
Limited freedom to enjoy life (Romans 14:1-2)

Firm Faith:

Believes what God says (Matthew 8:5-10)
Provides healing of body and soul (Matthew 9:2, 22, 29, 15:28; Mark 2:5)
Restores our sight — Literal sight in this passage, but also spiritual sight (Luke 18:32)
Grows stronger in impossible circumstances (Romans 4:19-20)
Expands our personal freedoms (Romans 14:23)
Is demonstrated through obedience (Romans 16:26, Hebrews 11)
Is based on God’s power not man’s wisdom (1 Corinthians 2:5)
Has Christ as its object (Galatians 2:20, Hebrews 12:2)
Is bold (2 Timothy 1:7)

How did you do? If you checked too many in the fragile faith category, don’t fret (see #1 in fragile list). Create a plan to renew your mind and strengthen those faith muscles.

When will you read your Bible? If it helps, write it on your daily calendar.
What will you read?
Ask God to strengthen you in the areas you’re weak.

Like any living thing, faith needs constant care to stay healthy. No one brushes her teeth and says, “Good, I never have to do that again.” So it is with faith. Moment by moment, opportunity by opportunity, we must choose to walk by faith, or, by default, we won’t.

My goal for this year is to choose faith! May we exercise our faith and face each day with the attitude that says, “Wow, what a Savior!”

LINKUP PARTY opens on December 28 at 6 am!

Christian Bloggers, come share your Blog with our audience below:

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LINKUP is open. Join my friend @debbieWwilson as we launch the New Year in faith. Share your blog!
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LINKUP: Past Failures Should Not Define the New Year {The Atlanta Journal-Constitution}

Patricia — Mon, 03 Jan 2022 15:52:22 +0000

The 11th chapter of the book of Hebrews in the New Testament lists the names of men and women of faith who trusted God through trials and impossible situations. The list includes the Jewish patriarchs Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. It also mentions leaders whose lives greatly impacted the story of God’s people, including Joseph, Moses, Gideon, Joshua, King David and the prophets.

But amid characters who undeniably deserve to receive the “Hall of Faith” trophy, some names often make attentive readers of Scriptures scratch their heads. Among them, two stand out: Samson, Israel’s last judge, and Rahab, the harlot.

Little is known about Rahab, except that she was a prostitute and crafty liar, born and raised in Israel’s enemy’s territory. Because her inn was by Jericho’s city walls, she offered her assistance to allow Israel’s spies into the city.

Rahab knew that she was in a precarious situation. She would undoubtedly be put to death if caught harboring the spies. Likewise, by siding with strangers, she took a massive chance since they could lose the battle or refuse to keep their promise of protecting her and her family. But she had heard about Israel’s God and decided to put her faith in his power and authority.

Samson is an altogether different story. The angel of the Lord announced his birth. He was set apart as a Nazarite — a man dedicated to God’s service and to help accomplish his plan for the Jews. After 40 years of Philistine oppression, he would be the next judge in Israel, and his mission was to defeat its enemy.

To help him fulfill his purpose, God gave Samson supernatural physical strength. However, as we read his story, it becomes clear that he wasted his power and destiny on practical jokes andwomen. In other words, Samson wasted his life. God planned to use him to strengthen the nation and return the Jews to worship God, and yet, he chose a path that ultimately led to his utter destruction.

Because Rahab was a lying prostitute and Samson ultimately gave up his divine favor, strength and honor, we tend to see them as failures. Indeed, because of their life story, it would be easy to regard the “Hall of Faith” mention of their names as a conundrum.

But interestingly, the New Testament does not mention either Rahab or Samson’s stories as failures. Instead, they are praised in Hebrews and other texts in the New Testament for their acts of faith. In the end, God fulfilled His ultimate purpose for Rahab and Samson, regardless of their fiascos.

The New Testament does not mention either Rahab or Samson’s stories as failures. Instead, they are praised in Hebrews and other texts in the New Testament for their acts of faith. In the end, God fulfilled His ultimate purpose for…
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Rahab was instrumental in Israel’s victory in Jericho. She also became a relative of Boaz and thus an ancestor of King David and Jesus Christ.

Likewise, as announced by the angel to his parents, Samson indeed began to rescue Israel from the Philistines when God granted his final wish. While 3,000 men and women gathered to offer a sacrifice unto their god Dagon for delivering the mighty man of Israel into their hands, God heard Samson’s prayer and restored his strength. While tied to the temple pillars as a prisoner, he pushed the structure and sacrificed himself to kill his people’s enemies.

The end of a year is hardly a time of indifference when contemplating one’s progress in life. We often face the last days of a year with either joy or a sense of defeat. We either look back and think ofthe many opportunities we wasted or rejoice by the many steps we took in the right direction. The issue with the former is that fixing our eyes on “what could have been” is hardly the attitude that will prompt us into the new year with the right mindset.

The end of a year is hardly a time of indifference when contemplating one’s progress in life. We often face the last days of a year with either joy or a sense of defeat. Here's an article on the @AJC about not letting our past failures…
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It may be that, like me, you did not cross off too many goals in your to-do list in 2021. It could be that the job is still the same, even though you had promised yourself that you were going to look for greener pastures this year. Or it could be that you had ambitious health and fitness goals on Jan. 1 and now contemplate the same (or worse) reflection in the mirror. It could be that certain relationships remain strained or that the prodigal child still wanders away from home.

If that is you, may Rahab and Samson’s stories give you hope and perspective as the new year dawns.

Instead of contemplating January with skepticism because of past failures, may we look ahead with the certainty that God can turn even our most significant weaknesses around and give us new strength to finish the dreams He birthed within our hearts.

“The One who calls you by name is trustworthy and will thoroughly complete His work in you.” the Apostle Paul, First Thessalonians, chapter 5 (The Passion Translation)

Patricia Holbrook is a columnist, author, blogger and international speaker. Visit her website www.soaringwithHim.com to learn about her speaking ministry, Bible studies and book. For speaking engagements and comments, email pholbrook@soaringwithHim.com.

This article was originally published in Patricia’s column for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on Saturday, January 1, 2022. Click HERE to find it on the AJC’s website.

LINKUP PARTY is open!

Christian Bloggers, come share your Blog with our audience below:

1. Add your Link.

2. Visit the blogger before or after and encourage them with a comment.

3. Share on social media. Click below to share on Twitter that you are joining us! We would love to have you follow the ministry on Twitter and Facebook as well: Soaring with Him FB Page

LINKUP is open! This week, I share my column about the danger of allowing past mistakes or failures to influence our determination to fulfill our goals for the New year. Join us and share your blog!
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